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    June 08

    转的, MS有点意思

    中国足球队输球的原因大总结
    一.草皮不适应
    1.草皮太硬了
    2.草皮太软了
    3.不适应阔叶草及其它一些草
    二.天气原因
    1.下雪
    2.下雨
    3.下冰雹
    4.阳光太好了
    5.冷
    6.热
    7.不冷不热(不能给对手造成麻烦)
    三.赛场因素  
    1.场内因素: 
    A.裁判帮他们
    B.裁判不帮我们
    C.对手身体太强壮
    D.对手技术太细腻
    E.门柱帮了他们
    F.对方守门员发挥BT+超常
    G.补时太短
    H.补时太长
    2.场外因素:
    A.客场作战,气氛影响
    B.主场作战,干扰太大
    C.观众不为我们喝彩
    D.有人往场内扔手雷
    3.场地原因
    A.门框太小,我们才没进球
    B.门框太大,他们才进的球
    C.场地太大了,所以他们都传到了空地上我们拿不到追不到无法防守
    D.场地太小了,到处都是人叫我怎么射门所以无法进攻
    四.抽签抽得不好
    1.同组都是强队踢输了.我靠,死亡之组,按惯例当然应该中国队输.
    2.同组都是中等水平队踢输了.主要是想赢怕输的思想包袱太重了,队员们没能放得开手脚.
    3.同组都是弱队踢输了.对对手不够重视,麻痹大意,一时疏忽.
    五.其他原因(外在)
    1.对亚洲强队踢输了,恐韩心理在作怪,走不出阴影.
    2.对亚洲弱队踢输了,对手进步太大了实在太大了,我们对他们没有秘密可言了.
    3.对欧洲弱队踢输了,中国队输给了欧洲队.
    4.对欧洲强队(比如德国队)0:1踢输了,告诉大家一个好消息:中国队仅以0:1输给了强大的德国队!!
    5.对欧洲强队(比如德国队)0:10踢输了,中国队踢出了自已的一贯水平,队员们也努力了,结果也不出全国人民所料.
    6.对欧洲强队(比如德国队)0:100踢输了,精彩的比赛!德国某球星进了20个,某球星进了25个!看来中国队跟德国队的水平差距确实是有一点的.
    六.其他原因(内在球员)
    1."海龟派"没回来踢输了,我们雪藏主力.
    2."海龟派"回来踢输了,时差没倒过来.
    3.我们故意输的,为了迷惑观看的其他对手或把教练赶走.
    4.我们为了等3008年世界杯,现在是在准备期.
    七.其他原因(内在综合)
    1.主教练技术差!
    2.中国球迷素质差!
    3.中国足协这个名字差!
    4.中国队队医技术差!
    5.中国足协领导人--办公室里那位倒水扫地的大妈差!
    八.没有我们想不到的
    1.草皮不软不硬,天气不冷不凉,裁判和门柱净帮着我们,对方没有守门员,
    2.补时时间长短我们说了算,
    3.到第三国去比赛,观众全都为我们猛喝彩,观众全都不往场内扔手雷,抽了一个人人都说好的签,"海龟派"回来后猛睡了一个月倒回时差参加比赛,换了个主教练,换了批外国球迷,换了个中国足协的牌子,换了中国队的队医,换了个中国足协领导人——办公室里的打杂大妈,踢输了——
    综上所述,原因是:今天我们队,真TM不在状态!

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